What is the Difference?

Though I am far from being the prophet or the great man that Alma was, missionary work has a similar effect on me in wanting to be able to sing like an angel and convince all that I meet of the truth and power of what I teach. But I realize that is not the Lord’s way. He has given all of his children free agency to choose.

I am left wondering why some accept our message with glad hearts and let the Gospel of Jesus Christ work a mighty change in them while others may accept it for a time, but it does not work a change in them, rather other things get in way and soon they no longer want to hear it. I have seen it over and over again. Some advance farther and seem to come to a moment of truth in their lives—will they change or not, but in the end they are not yet ready to take the last step of faith.

In looking at my own humble beginnings, I marvel that I was willing and ready to make that change. 

I think the difference for me was that I was looking for it. Something within me drove me to find what I knew was out there. I knew there was a God even without knowing much about Him and I knew that God loved me. I think that knowledge led me to believe in and search for His truth and the path of happiness he had laid for me in this life. I knew it was there. I did not find it easily. Many things distracted me, most of my own making, but I kept looking.

Alone in my brother’s apartment after months of searching, I found a rather plain looking book on a coffee table. Something inside compelled me to pick up that book, and when I began reading it, I knew and recognized immediately it contained what I was looking for. I cried and laughed for joy and I willing let its power work a mighty change in me, so powerful that it still influences my life nearly forty-seven years later.

What is the difference? I know that we are all God’s children and that He is reaching out to all of us and loves us equally. Why did I look for it and embrace it and others cannot see it?